Baranggutan : Warrior Princess

the diary of the talkative introvert

Childhood Memories

Oddly (or not), I grew up listening to old songs – those with lyrics telling stories more colorful than my picture books. I particularly like this one song I my sister and I used to sing. Of course, we’d end up fighting who gets to be Joni 🙂 I just heard it again today, and I suddenly felt nostalgic – not because of the lyrics or the irony of the story, but because of so many beautiful memories of my childhood – with old, old songs during Sundays and my mama’s sinigang na baboy (pork in tamarind soup). The bliss of innocence.

Joni: Jimmy Please Say You’ll Wait For Me
I’ll Grow Up Some Day You’ll See
Saving All My Kisses Just For You
Signed With Love Forever True

Conway:  Joni Was The Girl Who Lived Next Door
I’ve Known Her I Guess Ten Years Or More
Joni Wrote Me A Note One Day
And This Is What She Had To Say

Joni: Jimmy Please Say You’ll Wait For Me
I’ll Grow Up Some Day You’ll See
Saving All My Kisses Just For You
Signed With Love Forever True

Conway: Slowly I Read Her Note Once More
I Went Over To The House Next Door
Her Teardrops Fell Like Rain That Day
When I Told Her What I Had To Say

Conway : Joni Joni Please Don’t Cry
You’ll Forget Me Bye And Bye
You’re Just Fifteen I’m Twenty Two
And Joni I Just Can’t Wait For You

Conway : Soon I Left Our Little Home Town
Got Me A Job And Tried To Settle Down
But These Words Just Kept Haunting My Memory
The Words That Joni Said To Me

Joni:  Jimmy Please Say You’ll Wait For Me
I’ll Grow Up Some Day You’ll See
Saving All My Kisses Just For You
Signed With Love Forever True

Conway:  I Packed My Clothes And I Caught A Plane
Had To See Joni I Had To Explain
How My Heart Was Filled With Her Memory
And Ask My Joni If She’ll Marry Me

Conway:  I Ran All The Way To The House Next Door
Things Weren’t Like They Were Before
My Teardrops Fell Like Rain That Day
When I Heard What Joni Had To Say

Joni:  Jimmy Jimmy Please Don’t Cry
You’ll Forget Me Bye And Bye
It’s Been Five Years Since You’ve Been Gone
Jimmy I Married Your Best Friend John

 

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It’s Official!

I heard it in the news last night – summer has officially started! Having spent my entire life in this beautiful tropical group of islands, I wasn’t really in need of any declaration from our weather bureau. Last February, it was uncharacteristically warm – when it is usually one of the colder months with the cool breeze from Siberia blowing this way. Although my body is not really made for cold spells, I don’t complain when we get 19-degree cloudy afternoons. Temperature ranging from 19-25 degrees is what I consider “pleasant”. Below 19 is freezing for me and above 25 is, well, oven-temperature.

But now, I am preparing myself to battle 37-degree scorching afternoons, which I’m sure are well on their way to roast me to a nice crisp. The only nice thing about it is I’ve got every excuse to hit the beach! Hurray!!! See you soon, sand, sea and sun! 🙂

Blue Lagoon

Blue Lagoon in Pagudpod, Ilocos Norte, Philippines

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It’s gotta be Monday!

It’s not weird that I was having a hard time going to sleep last night. I was in the brink of tears at 1:45 am, and it didn’t help that it’s Monday already. I cannot recall when my aversion to this day of the week began. I could have been loathing it since I was kid, only now I even taste it in my lips. It doesn’t roll as nicely as it would unlike mondayfacewhen I say “Tuesday”, or “Wednesday”, or “Friday”. It’s like the Grinch on Christmas Day! >___<

So aside from my sleep battles, I had to wake up at 5am for some kill-me-on-the-treadmill-time. I was out of the house by 6:30 am, but I wasn’t able to catch a ride until an hour later. Even the cabs have mysteriously “disappeared”. They would usually just stop in front of me during an ordinary day. And no, Monday is never an ordinary day for me.

My ride was stuck in unusual traffic before we were even out of Taytay. I was relishing the cool air from the AC, when it suddenly stopped. The other folks inside the FX who have settled nicely before me all woke up because of the sudden gush of warmth inside the vehicle. The driver had to return our fare and we all alighted in Valley Golf, where the queue for the Ayala ride is already a madhouse. I had to go to Junction and find a way to get to Makati the earliest time possible. I was so tempted to just head back home, cry a little and sleep all day. But I decided I will not let this day get the better of me. I have a Road-to-Sexiness-project and tons of audit to complete, so I continued the journey (yes, I’m calling it that since counting from the time I got out of our house to the time I set foot in the gym, it totaled 3 very long hours!).

My day didn’t start very nicely. But I still was able to do what I planned to do in the morning. My hair is behaving nicely considering I wasn’t able to bring my blow-dryer with me. I had a super nice sandwich to keep me going. And I have some old music playing until it’s time to go home.

I am expecting a few more things to run off the rail since Monday is not yet over, but I guess that’s the key! I’m ready for it, so bring it on! What else can go wrong???

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From the Treasure Chest : 1

I have always loved writing verses. It started during high school. My teacher in Filipino challenged us to compose poems under time pressure, read aloud in class and get rewarded with bragging rights and a pack of chocolates. Who wouldn’t do anything for chocolates, right?!? 🙂

So my love affair with pens, paper and rhymes began. I was a kid then, and all my experiences only revolved around playing skipping ropes, watching cartoons, climbing trees and answering slum books. I didn’t find it useful as my material. This is when I got in touch with my boundless imagination for help. I was surprised with what I was able to come up with.

Years passed and of course, I got introduced to a lot of new things, grown-up things as I call them, helping me build a chest of emotions and stories I could dive into when my fingers itch to write again. No one really got to read all I’ve written. I think it’s my introvert self (?) kicking in 🙂

I was looking at the ones I’ve got in the computer. I found this one, dated April 27, 2007, and I felt I (finally) wanted to share it. So read on! (Disclaimer: This is purely a fragment of my colorful imagination. This is not in anyway related to any personal experience, past or present, of the author)

I kept it inside for the longest time
Thought it would cease on its own
Yet it grew despite suppression
I was feeling it alone
Pain will be hard to mask
Had I let it known and seen
In a way it’s good it was hidden
And my tears I won’t explain
Bitterness I brush away
But I can taste it with goodbye
It’s time to bid farewell to my most stupid lie
It was never lovely
You never meant it as I do
Those words are all empty
Worthless trinkets all from you
Somehow it’s good I kept it
I’d rather cry alone
Don’t know how I’d fare before you
If you had my secret known
Though it’s hell to see you always
While pretending it’s okay
I’d cross this road again
I won’t take the other way
I kept it for the longest time
I loved you on my own
And I never had the chance
To let you hear my song
So close yet unreachable
For I dare not lift a touch
All because you hold another
And you crave her all too much

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The Proposal

If there’s one thing about my new company, they have a LOT of things lined up to engage the employees – Financial Seminars, Product Trials, All sorts of Clubs (singing, dancing, even Japanese lessons!) and Fitness Programs. Last week they sent out the monthly First Come-First Served Free Gym Membership registration announcement. In partnership with Gold’s Gym, the aim is to strive for a fitter you! Nux! hahaha!

So I clicked the voting buttons. I just tried for the heck of it, since I’m aware that the chances of getting a slot will be slim. But maybe it’s destiny’s way of telling me I should really start moving again because I’ve tipped the scales quite wildly these past months. On February 28th, I got a confirmation that I was eligible for the free membership for the month of March. Hurray! 🙂

Es, my little baby friend also got selected and we we’re planning to go finish the program and get automatically enrolled for the following month. But last week, she sounded hesitant as she handed me the forms we need to get our fitness ball rolling. So I sent her a love letter today. It read:

Hey, Gym Buddy!

I have a proposal. Since I can sense that you are having second thoughts about using your gym membership, why don’t we go together? If we can follow below timelines, we’d be able to make sure we get to complete the required number of visits within the deadline. 🙂

gymPhuleeeeeeeeaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Let’s do this 🙂 🙂 🙂

Then next month, we can recruit your Tita Dolly!

She laughed when she read my email. But hey! I’m serious about this, so I laid out a plan that is feasible and not at all tiresome. The adjustment will entirely be from my end, since I will have to come in later than I usually would for M/W/F and then back to my early morning schedule in between. Woohoo! Me already! :p

I’m crossing my fingers that we can actually complete this. It’s now or never! And NOW begins tomorrow!

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Guilty Pleasures : 1st Edition

Most of my friends don’t know that I love watching romantic comedies and chick-flicks. I appeal to them as someone who’d rather see wrestling mania, basketball, and action/sci-fi movies. Although I do enjoy those stuff, too, I’m a girl through and through- forever giggly and teary-eyed as my rom-com movies close.

I’ve seen You’ve got Mail for over 20 times. I will never get tired of Shopgirl and NY152. I cried watching Sam Coulson enter the baseball field to tell Josie he’s in love with her. I will forever dream of living in Ireland because she breeds men like Gerry Kennedy who, even after death made sure the love of his life is never alone.

Meteor_Garden_Cast_03082009054702

When I was in college, I got hooked with San Cai and Dao Ming Si. Yes, I’m a Meteor Garden addict! I picked a schedule with a 6-hour break during college only to make sure I would not miss an episode of this series! I think it’s Jerry Yan’s dimples that got me drooling 🙂 hahaha! I’m such a sucker for the kilig factor and I always find a bit of myself in the headstrong lady protagonist (I’m sure I’m not alone here!).

A few months back, I woke up to see my Mama’s face glued to the laptop screen. I lazily poked my face to see what she’s up to. That was when I got introduced to Maya and Sir Chief. They’re too cute and the plot is very light – no violence, sex, & greed. Just good vibes and 1 million milligrams of kilig! I stay up late during weekdays to catch the replays. I hunt youtube and facebook for the teasers and play them on repeat! I just can’t get enough of it! I found someone who makes a compilation of the month’s episode and stitch it together to make a music video using the songs I grew up listening to. Yes, I’m so hooked i was one of the millions who cried watching last January 4’s episode. Although I love Sir Chief dearly, I felt my heart was wrenched and I hated him for what the scripts told him to say. I was so heartbroken that my fingers fumbled to find the blog of the show’s fans where they submit their stories. I was so relieved reading some of those and how they would want our love birds to make up. Without that blog site, I would have been awake until morning nursing my wounded heart.

I went online this afternoon to check if they have the teaser for Monday up. And they didn’t fail me 🙂 I’ve been playing the clip for at least 20 times already. And i’m sure it should be able to tide me over until tomorrow night.

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second thoughts

I’m generally a very conservative person – old-fashioned, relaxed, slow to change. I take things rather slowly – never rushing or wanting to tweak what have been the practice since it began.
I stayed in my first company for eight years. I was clueless when I set foot in that office in 2004. The things that happened in the duration of my stay tested me well. Sure, I’ve had my moments of shock, denial, and resistance but I’ve also collected enough cheers, pride, and friendship. When it was announced that I will be included in the list of people to be outsourced, I really felt the world was closing in on me. I was lost and I wasn’t sure of what I would do. The only thing certain is that all the habits formed in my eight-year affair with Mr.Moller, Wynsum Plaza, and Emerald Avenue will have to cease – and no, I wasn’t ready for it.
Image

Since there wasn’t much choice left for me and all the others, I signed a new contract with an IT company. Thinking about it now, I realized the biggest thing i was afraid of – no, make that the ONLY thing I was afraid of is losing a regular source of income. I was so hopeful that things will get better, that I will learn to love what I was tasked to do. I did learn to understand the people around me more. But the constant exposure to negativity is taking a toll on me now. The positive aura I wanted to slowly inject to my peers’ system is starting to flutter.
I have indirectly given a hint to the most important team in my life that I want to move out of that work den. Yes, I’m speaking about my family. They are, after all, the biggest reason why I’m working anyway.
I’ll be turning thirty in a few months and at night one question keeps me awake – When will I finally start living my life? I hope before the day I hit the big 3-o, I will come to terms with myself and be able to get enough courage to steer towards another direction – the not-so-famous choice this time.
I think I’ve earned it to finally break the rules I’ve set for myself and leave, if not all, a chunk of my conventional-self in the past.
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Friday Epiphany

It’s the 1st of March! How time flies (okay, this is so cliche!). A year and a month ago, I was an apprehensive soul moving to a new work place. I still am – though I’ve been here for quite a while. Battles in my head are waging. I’m always trying to find reasons for the things that have happened and are happening. I get too tired sometimes that I will just convince myself, “Yes, this happened for a reason and THAT is enough”. But I rarely let go of a thought until i get the answer I want, so yeah, here’s to more tension headaches to come!

Most of my questions have been aswered. I’m now left with decisions I have to make – soon. I still have fragments of qualms lurking in the corners of my mind. Some of them I cannot easily brush off. I fear I might disappoint some people in the process of setting forth on the journey I want to take. I have doubts that what I want may not be what is right for me. I don’t want to waste my time in a place that will not help me grow. But each day, I realize I do learn something, and I become a better version of myself. Does that mean this is where I should be?

Maybe I’m just overanalyzing things. I should put this worry train to a stop – a full stop, since it’s not really taking me anywhere! I’ll just live each day as it comes. I just need to remember that being able to see the sunshine of a new morning is a wonderful gift in itself – why should I want more?

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